Monday, April 23, 2018

Until We Meet Again

Five thoughts on Game Six

1. I get how Peter McNabb spent years in the bigs getting hit about the face and neck and he’s no spring chicken anymore but can we get the beauty department to ease up on the makeup? Ironsides was done up like he was ready to head to Boulder and cougar a sorority. 

2. The biggest difference in the game tonight? The Avs shot from the outside and the Predators got to the net. The Predators successfully clogged the high slot and outworked in the corners. Rinne wasn’t really challenged until the game was out of hand. Unfortunately there aren’t three pointers in hockey.  Although...hmmmm. 

3. The other difference? The hitting. The Avs and Predators combined for more hits in the first period than there were in all of game five.  I don’t think this was a good look for the Avs. Yeah, they brought the wood but that’s what works for the Predators. They want to get dirty. The Avalanche needed to run around the Preds, not hit them. 

4. It didn’t take long for the wheels to come off of Hammond, did it? The defense had a bad night and Hammond’s last game was spectacular but he used up all of his turbos. 

Next year the Avs have an irritating goalie problem that I feel was compounded when Calvin Pickard was left unprotected in favor of protecting Rocco Grimaldi from Vegas. 

Varlamov, who probably pulled a groin this morning reaching for the cereal, has one more year left on his $5.9 million contract. Bernier is a career backup and Hammond is 30. Outside of that they don’t have any outstanding prospects at the position. None of that makes me feel good. Had the Avs given Pickard a chance I don’t think they would be staring down the barrel of another Varlamov contract.

5. The Avs showed a lot of guts, chemistry, and skill in hanging with the Predators like they did. They weren’t supposed to make the playoffs much less push Nashville to six games. The experience they got will pay off in the future. 

The Avs need to continue to develop their second and third lines. Nemeth was a beast during this series and gives the Avs a rock to build on in their defensive forward corps. Kerfoot and Jost will continue to develop and Compher showed a lot of promise. I’m excited to see Makar and Timmons in a couple of years and what becomes of what I think will be a stout and dangerous defense. 

After much maligning I think Joe Sakic deserves credit for what he did this year. He turned Matt Duchene into Sam Girard, Hammond, and a lot of potential.  He seems to have finally learned the position. He’ll make mistakes, everybody does, but Joe made a lot of good decisions and keeps on learning. It’s about time. 

It’s been fun writing the Dog and Pony Show this series. It was like putting on a very old, smelly pair of jeans that everybody forgot about. 

Until next time, gang!



Saturday, April 21, 2018

Mmmm...Fish Sticks

These very special Game Five Five Thoughts are brought to you by the Long John Silver’s Catfish Fish Stick Hockey Stick platter with a bitter Distinct Kicking Motion sauce. Are you ready to get kicked, Nashville?

1. HAMBURGLED!

Raise your hand if you saw that one coming. Really? I mean really?! Andrew Hammond has seen more Tim Horton’s in his year than NHL hockey and he uncorked a whopper against a Preds team that had home ice, confidence, and every reason to win. 

Even better, that was pretty clean work by Hammy. Great rebound control, excellent coverage on the angles, and all the kick saves a growing body needs. Somebody has been doing his XYZ drills. 

Good goalie. Pet the goalie. 


2.  NATHAN MACKINNON IS THE BUDDHA!

I know dedicated Buddhists who would have shot that puck. Luke Skywalker would have shot that puck. Gandhi would have shot that puck. EVERYBODY would have shot that puck! 

Not Mack. He hovers. 

Just who does he think he is?! Your next Hart trophy winner, that’s who he is. 

3. I can’t see too well. Is that number 37 a young Chris Drury with the saucer pass to Andrighetto for the win?! 

Sakes. I just can’t even.

4. So I was thinking today, “ya know who’s missing in the playoffs this year? Detroit.”

Bahahahaha!

5. Whew! We get at least one more ride on this roller coaster. I’d like to see a game seven. This Avs team deserves a game seven. 


GO AVS!

Tuesday, April 17, 2018

Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego

Five thoughts on Game Three

1. SHIZZLE!

Raise your hand if you saw the Avs chasing Rinne while controlling large portions of the game. 

(Crickets)

Things that would concern me if I was a Preds fan? That. Cup winners don’t get their goalie chased in the first round against the eighth seed. Furthermore, Cup winners also don’t spend the majority of a game cheap shotting the eighth seed in an attempt to goad them into taking penalties. 

Even worse? The NBC announcers advocating that the Predators cheap shot the Avs. What is this the Federal League? If that’s the case I’m buying the Avs a palette of foil so they can take turns punching P.K. Subban in the back of the head. 

2. Big money cornerstone Avalanche players in the last five years who wanted out:

Ryan O’Reilly, Paul Stastny, and Matt Duchene. 

Playoff games by former big money cornerstone Avalanche players this year: 

Three (Stastny)

Former big money cornerstone Avalanche players who are stuck on rebuilding teams: The other two guys. 

Shrewd, gentlemen. Shrewd. 

3. Gatorade Flow commercial: ...Gatorade with a smooth finish.

Me: What is it, vodka?

Tamara (hockey wife): I hope so!

4. I know Mack was electric and Landy did outstanding Captain things but Patrik Nemeth should get an extra steak at the team dinner.  If he wasn’t blocking shots he was playing smart and stifling Nashville. It is games like this that get you into the Shjon Podein Avs Grinder Hall of Fame. 

5. I don’t care how they do it but the squad must bring the energy again in the next game. They will not win a trench war with Nashville but the boys might have a chance if they out run them.  Feisty play will always create opportunities especially when used against entitled teams that take penalties. 

Giddyup!


Sunday, April 15, 2018

So, That Happened

Five thoughts on Game 2:

1. Alrighty! Nate scored two 
and the Avs gave away two to a team that should have scored eight but merely scored five. Progress? Progress. 

Bear in mind this was an away game and any Avs defenseman not named Zadorov spent the night getting re-acquainted with the fine art of the hip check:


I’ll always remember the part where Siemens’ head snaps back like he got kicked in the face by an eagle. 

3. Wife: His name is really Duncan Siemens?

Me (Smirking): Yes. 

Announcer: Duncan Siemens and Forsberg come together in the corner. 

Me (Snicker)

4. #ryanhartmanemptynetgoalmakesaaronangry

5. Okay, okay. So NBC said Avs are starting thirty-seven rookies in the playoffs who have played a combined 4-1/3 playoff games (#truefact). For them to stand in with Nashville says a lot about the character and chemistry of the squad. Who knows, if Bernier doesn’t move on to a beer league mid-series the kids may just win a game. 


On to Denver and the best single season home record of any Avalanche squad. Here’s to altitude!

Friday, April 13, 2018

Et tu, Playoffs?

Five thoughts on Game 1- Avs vs. Preds

1. The NBC announcers had two Avs talking points: They are young and inexperienced, and Samuel Girard played for Nashville. Otherwise I don’t think they watched any Avs games this season. 

Other Nashville items NBC checked off their list: 

-Video of an Elvis mannequin
-Neon lights
-Preds fans in sparkly boas
-Photo of Johnny Cash stoned and eating a birthday cake while sitting under under a bush. 

2. The Avs really missed EJ, especially in the 3rd.  Zadorov had a nifty goal and Girard is plucky but the Avs don’t have defensive depth to hang for three periods against the Preds. I will be beating the “Avs don’t have enough defensive depth” drum until Cale Makar and Conor Timmins arrive. 

3.  I hate Ryan Hartman a lot already. I’m not at Todd Bertuzzi/Brad Marchand/Kirk Maltby levels yet but his hatred is just out of the box and should grow into a wonderful focus for my angst. 

4. The Preds basically double teamed MacKinnon all night. The Avs have one scoring line. The math on this isn’t hard. I want Alex Kerfoot to turn into a better Dan Hinote and punch somebody in the throat while deflecting pucks in off his ass. Nobody parlayed the “irritating rollerblader with one move” triple threat into success like Hinote did. 

5.  If the Avs want to win a game in this series they need start hitting and clean up their net. Bernier can get hot but no matter how much we don’t want to admit it he’s a career backup. The kids need to grow up a lot between now and game two. 

Damn, it’s nice to be in the playoffs again!